Thank You. Do you say and hear it enough?

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Thank you.

I would like to share to you about the importance of praise, admiration and thank you, and having it be specific and genuine. And as brief as the opening line, so shall this post  also be  like. 

And the way I got interested in this was, I noticed in myself, when I was growing up, and until about a few years ago, that I would want to say thank you to someone, I would want to praise them, I would want to take in their praise of me and I’d just stop it. And I asked myself, why? I felt shy, I felt embarrassed, the least awkward. And then my question became, am I the only one who does this?  

 It has been a recurring theme in so many movies and reality tv shows that discuss the thing that causes stress, anxiety, depression and even addiction to people is the issue that comes down to something as simple as, their core wound is their father died without ever saying he’s proud of them. But then, they hear from all the family and friends that the father told everybody else that he was proud of him, but he never told the son. It’s because he didn’t know that his son needed to hear it. 

So my question is, why don’t we ask for the things that we need? I know a gentleman, married for 30 years, who’s longing to hear his wife say, “Thank you for being the breadwinner, so I can stay home with the kids,” but won’t ask. I know a woman who’s good at this. She, once a week, meets with her husband and says, “I’d really like you to thank me for all these things I did in the house and with the family.” And he goes, “Oh, this is great, this is great.” And praise really does have to be genuine, but she takes responsibility for that.

So, the question is, why was I blocking it? Why were other people blocking it? Why can I say, “I’ll have my burger with some fries and sundae on the side, I need size nine shoes, etc.” but I won’t say, “Would you appreciate or praise me this way?” 

So, I’m going to challenge us all. Like my wife has been to me the past years of our married life by being vocal and direct in saying what she truly needed to hear from me — I want you to be honest about the praise that you need to hear. What do you need to hear? Go home to your wife — go ask her, what does she need? Go home to your husband — what does he need? Go home to those special people in your life — what do they need. Go home and ask those questions, and then help the people around you. 

I think it’s simple. And why should we care about this? We talk about world peace. How can we have world peace with different cultures, different languages? I think it starts household by household, under the same roof. So, let’s make it right in our own backyard. 

To all of you who happen to read this simple post — I want to say Thank You. And maybe somebody’s never said that to you, by being a father, mother, husband, wife, brother, sister, friends to your loved ones in the purest sense of those words,  you’ve already done a really, really good job. 

And for that, Thank you.

Photo credits: Google photos


Post Valentine Words of Thanks to fellow Bloggers.

Thank you for your support Chalk Illustration

For this post, I will have to defer from the subjects I usually write about and what this blog intends to achieve, in general, which is to somehow inspire, provoke and motivate my readers, in order to THANK some of my awesome blogging friends for their kindness of hearts and support on my initiative to surprise my lovely wife for the Valentine’s Day.

Truly, the blogging community is a loving and inspiring community. Although we could say that friendships built here are considered “virtual”, it is not far too different from having friends who are physically-present — support, love and encouragement-wise. The blogging world is not only about reading someone else’s post and responding to it, or the other way around, writing a post and someone responds to it. I believe it’s far deeper than that, here every conversation made through comments gradually solidify the somewhat “state of friendship” that was established through such exchanges. Undeniably, there were bloggers who are dedicated and genuinely appreciative not just of their own blogs but those of their fellow bloggers as well. That’s what makes blogging thrive and stay afloat despite the crazily overwhelming scenarios the world and all of humanity have to deal with every single second of every single day. It wasn’t overpowered and ultimately devoured by such chaos and disorder because blogging has a “heart” (the goodness in each of the bloggers who desires to share to the world their own stories in order to inspire and promote humanity), “mind” (the desire to stimulate consciousness, whether it be personal, spiritual, psychological, societal or environmental) and “soul” (the initiative to provoke and instill not just awareness but the desire for action). To my fellow bloggers out there, remain true to the purpose of your blogs, you are making a big difference in this world by transcending boundaries in order to deliver your own unique stories and personal views and opinions that matter; of course, I know you are aware of that too.

Having said that, I would like to express my Special THANKS and GRATITUDE to the following bloggers for their kindness and support to my recent endeavor to give my wife a “one of a kind Valentine experience.” THANK YOU for responding even on such a short  and seemingly random notice 😉 :

Oristel Guenael. Thank you for the generosity of writing not just a simple message on the comment section of my post (which by the way was my only request) but you made an entirely separate post for my wife on your blog. That act of kindness for someone whom you haven’t met personally has totally blown me away! It made me inexpressively happy, and happier all the more, the moment I saw my wife’s reaction when she read that particular post. She was so amazed, and all she could say was, “The one who wrote this seem to have known me for a very long time. I can relate to every word that he has written!” And she asked later on: “How long have you known this person?” Which I replied, “A couple of weeks. When I ask him to give a simple Valentine message for us he immediately said “yes” and asked for your name, that’s all”. Then she said: “Wow! Seem like he’d known me for years. He’s amazing!”

I do understand that every word of encouragement written or spoken genuinely from the heart, in it, adopts a universal language that speaks directly to the person whom it was spoken to. And, to me, that’s the language of kindness. – Andrei

Karen Viramontes. Thank you for the lovely and sweet lines you’ve written seconds upon my request! To quote:

I never knew my soul could be so attracted to yours.

To know that you’re mine and I’m all yours.

The moments we share are priceless indeed,

nothing could ever replace the love that we have.

My soul belongs with yours and yours with mine.

 Happy hearts day to the both of you.

Thank you! That made our day extra special!

Special and heartfelt THANKS as well to the following that left sweet comments on the post: Brittany (ordinarilyextraordinarymom), Ali Grimshaw (flashlightbatteries), Mr. Buffy Devane, Letters that Matter, Radhika (radhiksreflection), and Nina (thehapplylife101).

For those who “Liked” the post: Carolyn Dennis-Williams, piratepatty, MissKymmiee, Love Mendoza, thecatalystsforchange, Patricia, Gbolabo Adetunji, Safia Osman, Ragazza Triste, Makayla Nielson, myyalia, thegirlonthego08.

[And for those other good friends I have here at WP who might have liked the post and/or left their comments given they got the chance to read it in time for the occasion 😉 ]

As I’ve said, the blogging community is a loving and inspiring community. For this purpose, THANK YOU, The Wife was super-duper-ultra HAPPY! Mission accomplished!

I salute you all! 🙂

– Andrei